Good morning! Every night I dream of responding to all the
comments, of telling you how impressed I am with your honesty, how amazed I am
with your insights, how inspired I am by your story. I am hoping to this weekend but in case it doesn’t happen,
know that I am just blown away by the comments. Especially yesterday’s.
If you haven’t had a
chance to yet, read the comments from yesterday’s post. Pretty powerful stuff
if you ask me. Just reading the simple statements “I can’t change…BUT I can…” really
spoke to me. So check them out and perhaps add your own comment. Thank you to
everyone who shared and thank you to all of you for continued support of each
other!
I know that it is hard to admit what we cannot change but it
is also freeing. There are so many things in life that I refused to admit that
I couldn’t change. So I just kept hammering away at them endlessly, wasting so
much positive energy and yet also creating so much negative energy. Dwelling on
things that I could not change (people for example) kept me from being present
with my kids. It is also had the power to put me in such a mood that I would be
on the verge to yell all day. I know so many people want to believe that
learning not to yell is just about learning how to discipline our kids to
change their behavior. Sure, that is a part. But it is only a part.
Understanding ourselves and what impacts US, especially those big ‘ole things
we cannot change, is a huge part as well.
TODAY’s THOUGHTs:
“Hakuna Matata!!!” ~ Song from the Lion King. It means Don’t
Worry!
“Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes
it is the letting go.” ~Hermann Hesse
Yes, let that big trigger that you cannot change go. Let it
go. Stop worrying about it. Focus on you and your response. It is hard and
uncomfortable and annoying but again, freeing.
TODAY’s ACTIONs:
1. If you haven’t yet, do yesterday’s exercise. If you did
yesterday’s exercise, read your comment and write in down on a piece of paper
where you can see it daily. If you don’t want to share it with your family,
perhaps put it in your sock drawer so you’ll see it each morning.
2. Fill in the following phrase on the blog post: 'I will not
worry about … if I start to feel the worry coming I will…" They say that it is
very important to write down goals because it takes them from being a mere
thought to a reality. In this case, a powerful reality. With 2 days to go until
“yell no more day” I want to make sure you all have a yelling
alternative in place for your big trigger.
password: icanyellless
3. All day, repeat your “I cannot change…” phrase and your “I
will not worry” phrase as you focus on managing your big trigger. Start to
believe these phrases. Write them down 1000 times if needed. Share them with a
friend. Just start to believe them so you can truly accept them and focus on
you.
Coming up: Two more days until the official start to yelling less so make sure to check your emails this
week! I know many of you have already begun to yell less and that is
fantastic! And I know many of you have just focused on learning these last 11+
days and that is fantastic too. Tomorrow I am going to ask you to set a
goal for yourself and tell your support group and then we’ll go at it!
To help you plan ahead, this would also be a great time to pick up any orange
paraphernalia you think would be helpful to have on the big starting day: orange post it
notes for a reminder, orange nail polish, orange napkins, and orange pen.
Peruse my 100 Alternatives to yelling http://theorangerhino.com/
Have a great day!
It's snow and beautiful here...and right now very soothing and peaceful.
Hope we all have days just as peaceful!
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