Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Day #28: Kaisen and Letting Go

(Notice from Jenna:  for some reason she skipped Day #28, but I'll add an extra day for your 30-Day Challenge.  This came out as her Day #29 post.)

From the Orange Rhino:

Good morning!

SO, um wow. Today is day 29 which means tomorrow is Day 30, the last day of this mini Challenge. So only 2 days left. There are two ways to say that, ugh, only 2 days left I didn’t achieve what I wanted, or YES ONLY 2 days left. 2 days is a short time. I can do anything in a period of two days! So lets look at it the latter way. I have pulled a lot of thoughts into this email because I didn’t want to not share them. Enjoy?!

It has be said that I am a control freak and a perfectionist!  Well, I used to be and that was certainly part of my yelling problem. I got all worked up when things didn’t work out; I would get in a mood and then yell unnecessarily. I am learning to let go. To accept that the kids’ beds are made the way they want and that that is cool. To accept that I can’t do everything perfect and right all the time. To accept that I can’t control when a baby gets sick or when I get sick and that I just have to do my best at any given moment. To accept that life can be hard sometimes and that I still need to show love to my babies even when my world feels like it is crumbling (see tonight’s forthcoming post.) The last two reasons are why this email has so many thoughts. I wanted to get one out yesterday since we are so close to the end, I wanted to send it out and be perfect in my vision. But sometimes, I have learned, I need to let go in order to do better. My body needed to sleep in yesterday, I needed to be purely with me. So I did. And it gave me strength to get through the day!

TODAY’s THOUGHTs:
“All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.”
~ Havelock Ellis

“Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go.” ~ Hermann Hess

I LOVE THESE QUOTES. They are so true I have learned. Sometimes it is the letting go that has helped me to get more - more love that is. And here is a concept/word instead of a quote.

"Kaizen: Continuous Improvement."

This is a term I learned in undergraduate business school way back when.  It is a popular term in the business world because the truth is, we are always improving, we must always improve to stay at the head of our game. When we get comfortable, we must push and seek improvement. When we are uncomfortable, we must push and seek improvement. Sometimes the uncomfortable is what creates improvement.

I share this today to remind you that we are all works in progress. Every day I learn something new about myself, my kids, my parenting style.  I am continually learning, and continually tweaking my approach to improve myself. Do not give up on yourself if you are not as far as long as you hoped to be. This is a process! These 28 days I know you have continually improved – even if it as simple as your awareness is higher.


TODAY’s ACTIONs:
1. Even if you aren’t a control freak like me (but really trying to be less so!), ask yourself, is there something you can let go of to be happier? To yell less? Perhaps it is forgiving someone? Perhaps it is letting go of 1 rule because you have 10 already? Perhaps it is letting go of nitpicking how things are cleaned up, as long as they are?
Share your Letting Go in this blog post:
password: icanyellless

2. Let go of past yells. I have said it before but I can’t say it enough. Holding on to feeling angry that you yelled when you didn’t want to won’t do you any good. Let it go. Focus on one moment at a time! You can do this!!!

3. Think of ALL the progress you have made. Remind yourself that this is a process! Do not give up!

TODAY’s TIP:
When you are upset about a kid’s mess (or anything that in the big picture is okay to let go of) and you want to scream, just starting singing “Letting it go, Letting it go.” Maybe even turn it into a dance party. Exercise is great for calming down!

Have a good day! Stomp on!

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